Saturday, November 2, 2013

The year that they were NOT Batman and Robin

I like things a certain way.  There are things that are important to me.  As my boys get older, they don't necessarily like things the same way I do.  Their priorities are different.  Up until about age 5-6, I could manipulate coax Jonah to do whatever I wanted him to do. I could make him believe that my idea was his idea.  It was a beautiful thing.  Well, at least in theory.  I got him to do/be/dress/act the way I wanted and I was happy.  But, his personality wasn't shining through.  His decisions weren't evident.  His voice wasn't heard.  I don't know if I would understand how damaging that is if my husband hadn't lived a large part of his life like that.  He learned at an early age that he had to "do the dance to get the hug."  While the person that demanded that of him still doesn't own that, Dan carries the weight and even the ramifications of that to this day.  So, I'm very aware of it.

And, because I'm aware of it, I'm determined to not do that to my kids.  It is an internal struggle.  It is easier to convince them to do things my way than to let them have a mind of their own.  But, part of becoming the people God wants them to be is learning to make decisions and live with the consequences.  (even if there isn't a lot at stake!)

So, that brings me to Halloween.  This was a big year for me.  I put aside my own wishes and let my kids be who they wanted to be.  I made gentle suggestions.  I pled my case.  In the end, I lost.  Actually, where Jonah was concerned, we had a great compromise.  Someone reading this might think "Seriously, you are devoting a blog post to your kids choosing their own costumes?  Big deal!"  But, you should understand that in the years that I longed to be a momma, I had big dreams about costumes.  And, a generic costume from Wal-Mart wouldn't fit into those dreams.  (except, now they do and it wasn't Wal-Mart but Target!)

Jonah's years in costumes that I picked were so stinkin' cute!  Seriously, he was an original and totally rocked them!  Except for the first year when he was a pea in the pod but that was due to my poor planning.  Those costumes are everywhere for infants but I still stand by how cute it was/is.  I'd choose it again.  (Assuming the Jack in the Box I wanted was still sold out!)

Seriously, our costumes have been so cute over the years...take a stroll down memory lane with me.  

2006- A Pea In The Pod for Trunk or Treat @ FBC, Vidalia

2007- Cat In the Hat for Trunk or Treat

2007- A Skunk for Preschool

2008- A Hotdog for Trunk or Treat

2008- A UPS Man for Preschool

2009- Peter Pan for Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party

2009- Pirate for Trick or Treating

2009- Cowboy for the Fall Festival at Stetson Baptist Church

2010- Boxer for Trick or Treating AND The Fall Festival at Stetson Baptist Church

2011- Star Wars for Trick or Treating

2012- Spider Man and The Spider
So, you see why costumes are a big deal to me.  But, before the holiday ever came this year, I decided to let my boys be who THEY wanted to be.  I'd gently make suggestions but I'd leave it there.  My gentle suggestions definitely included themes.  I hoped for BatMan and Robin or Mike and Sully.  I was even okay with 2 different TMNT costumes.  But, I took them to Party City and let them choose.  Jonah chose Iron Man and Micah chose Mike Wazowski.  (Gasp...those don't coordinate AT ALL!)  But, we bought them.  And, we kept looking everywhere we went. 

Jonah stuck with Iron Man.  Not just Iron Man but the same Iron Man that every other kid had.  Micah changed his mind and chose Jake.  Then, I got the idea that Jonah should be Captain Hook.  How cute would that be?  But, Jonah said No.  (several times!)  When I was working the JBF Consignment Sale, I ran across a bright orange Astronaut costume.  He had actually mentioned being an Astronaut or Scientist so I took a picture and text it to my friend Susan because Jonah was with her. 

I got it that day and he LOVED it when he saw it.  He was seriously thrilled!  And, I was thrilled.  Not because he chose one I liked but because he chose one that he really loved.  (And, maybe a little because it was only $15 but was a really nice costume!) So, for the first time ever, there was no theme, there was no coordination and there were no mail-order costumes.  But, there were really big smiles and lots of fun.  And, a mom who is learning to let things go that don't really matter and focus on what does...THE MOMENT!

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